Can't Let You Go
by Duke and Red Forever
Summary: Scarlett is all set to get married but what happens when she sees an old friend who still has feelings for her? S/SE, S/D
1. Old Friends

Disclaimer: We do not own GI Joe!

Can't Let You Go

Chapter 1: Old Friends

Duke closed the file he'd been working on and sighed, running his hands over his face. It wasn't like he'd really been paying attention to the report anyway. He turned around and eyed the wedding invitation hanging from his office bulletin board with disdain. He slumped down in his chair, his head leaning back so he could stare at the ceiling. It was better than staring at that damn piece of paper. How could one piece of paper cause so much pain?

'Easy.' He thought. It was her wedding invitation to someone else. His girl was marrying someone else. Someone he didn't even like. Did that make it better or worse? He let out a disgusted sound. He was truly the world's biggest idiot. Here it was, practically her wedding day and he was in his office groaning about it. Some man of action he was. He had been so foolish to let her get away, and here it was just a day before she would be marrying someone else. His thoughts, as they inevitably did, traveled back to her. He never could live down the day she had ultimately called him out on his feelings for her, and how he denied everything. He had told her she was seriously mistaken. Ha, like she had bought any of that! Here was the woman that knew him better than he knew himself and he was trying to lie to her.

He sighed with longing as he remembered the several occasions they had crossed the line into something more than friendship. Their chemistry was hot like a volcano and when it erupted… Once again he looked at the invitation. It should have been his name next to hers but it wasn't. Duke turned away from the paper invitation as if it had slapped him in the face. He got up to stare out his small office window. When they had been together, they had been amazing. Duke had never felt so strongly for someone, EVER, and never since. He furrowed his brow in frustration, thinking how when the relationship had gotten got serious he had always pulled away…blaming his work. And she had always gone back to Snake Eyes. Tomorrow she would be Snake Eyes' forever.

Tonight was Scarlett's big co-ed bachelorette party. Snake Eyes was not having a bachelor party. Duke was relieved; after all he would have had to plan it. Yes, to add to this sick and twisted journey, Snake Eyes had asked him to be the best man. He wasn't sure how he would have been able to plan a grand party for the guy who was marrying the love of his life. Snake Eyes had wanted to spend tonight alone meditating and Duke was more than happy to let him do just that. He thought it was odd that Snake Eyes would choose him as they never were really close. Perhaps it was a "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" kind of deal since Duke was almost positive that Snake Eyes knew every detail of his and Scarlett's romantic history.

Romantic history, but was it history? Duke had tried to stifle his feelings after finding out Scarlett was engaged, but the feelings never went away; the opposite in fact. It was like fate was throwing his past mistakes in his face. He grimaced; it was easy to hide his feelings, at least for most people. But then people usually saw what they wanted to see. Both Snake Eyes and Scarlett had been assigned to a special team that took them away from base, so Duke hadn't seen them in practically a year. He and Scarlett emailed constantly and threw in an odd phone call here or there. He blew out a frustrated breath. If he had just been honest with her and told her about his feelings! She had asked him point blank if he wanted her to stay instead of going off with Snake Eyes. And of course, like the chicken shit he was when it came to their relationship, he told her to go. He crunched the water bottle he hadn't even realized he'd picked up. "Get a grip, Hauser. You should know better than anyone else life is short and you don't get second chances."

A knock startled him out of his regrets and Flint poked his head in. "Snakes and Scarlett just arrived. You ready to say hi?" Duke nodded briskly, tossing the crunched water bottle into the trash as he followed Flint to the chopper landing pad. "I know this is going to be hard for you." Flint acknowledged. The crunched water bottle hadn't gone unnoticed. They both glanced at each other knowing this was bro-code for Flint meaning he was there to talk to if Duke needed it.

"Yeah, but I'll make it through." Duke sighed as they exited the building. He cupped his hands over his eyes shielding away the sunlight. She had her back to him as she pulled some duffel bags out of the chopper. He smiled, feeling something between euphoria and pain when he saw her. She looked the same, with her red hair tumbling down her back in her signature ponytail.

"Well, well, well…look what the wind blew in," Duke called as he got closer. Scarlett whirled around to face him, already a huge smile on her face.

She threw her arms around him and pulled him into a hug, "It's so good to see you Conrad!" Duke closed his eyes vowing to remember this hug. She pulled back and took his hands in hers.

"I-" Duke started but was cut off by a shrieking sound in the distance that was getting louder and closer. Duke turned to watch Lady Jaye run full speed at them. She pulled Scarlett away from him into a hug of her own.

"I tried to stop her, but she was already doing that thing that only dogs can hear," Flint sighed, watching the two best friends unite. Duke smiled seeing how happy Scarlett was to see Lady Jaye. They were having such a fast paced and animated conversation. Both women were smiling. He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see Snake Eyes give Flint and him a wave.

"Snake Eyes, congratulations!" Flint exclaimed, extending his hand for a shake. Snake Eyes took it and then patted Duke on the back.

"Yeah, congrats, buddy." Duke tried to sound just as enthusiastic. Lady Jaye began to pull Scarlett towards base.

"Duke, you are coming tonight? Right?" Scarlett asked as she was being pulled passed the group of men.

"Um, yeah, I was planning on it." Duke answered.

"Good, we can catch up then." She smiled and continued to walk with Lady Jaye.

"_I'm glad you're going. Keep an eye on her, okay? I don't want tonight to ruin anything for tomorrow,"_ Snake Eyes signed. Duke nodded.

"Well, let's help you with your luggage, bro. Get you settled in." Flint offered. Snake Eyes nodded and the three men grabbed the bags and followed the girls inside.

Lady Jaye and Scarlett dumped her duffels on the floor of their quarters and collapsed next to each other on the coach. "Did you leave the kitchen sink? And exactly how much of what is stuffed in those duffels is actually clothes and not weapons of some kind?"

Scarlett laughed, feeling better than she had in weeks. It was good to be home, good to see Allison. "Allie, you know I don't need any weapons other than my hands and my cross bow."

Allie arched an eyebrow, "You didn't answer my question."

Shana sighed dramatically, "Not all of them. I actually took your advice and bought some of the clothes you emailed me pics of.

Jaye sat up, "YOU bought clothes, of your own free will, you went shopping without me, and you actually bought clothes? Let's see!" She made a mad dive towards the closest duffle bag and sure enough, she found a couple of outfits she had suggested Shana purchase.

Allie gestured for Shana to stand up so she could hold her friend's new clothing up to check for color and style.

Shana held the dark navy jacket while Allie fussed with the blouse, "I didn't buy everything you sent because, let's face it, I'm heading to an isolated mountain cabin. Nice clothes would just get messed up."

Allie murmured her agreement, "Yeah, but what you got is good. The courdory blazer is a little dressier than you usually go for but paired with new jeans and printed blouse you'll be dressy enough for your party."

"But still look like me, right?" Shana asked, concerned.

Allie rolled her eyes, "Of course. Would I tell you to buy something that would look bad on you?"

"Your version of what looks good on me is vastly different than mine."

Allie laughed, "That's because you think jeans or sweats are an answer to an occasion."

"Hey, I have a dress for the wedding and a new outfit for the party, that's enough."

Allie put the clothes on the back of the coach and eyed her friend carefully, "Are you disappointed that you're spending your honeymoon in the mountains?"

"No. Of course not...it's perfectly fine…" she stopped talking when Allie gave her the bullshit look. "Fine, okay, it would have been nice to go somewhere different. Isolation is fine, I mean, it is our honeymoon, but a trip to the beach would have been nice…"

"It's not too late to change his mind."

Shana sighed, "You know how he feels about that mountain and the beach will be there another time." She decided a change of subject was in order, "So how have things been with you and Dash?"

They chatted for a while before Allie had looked at the clock and decided it was time for Shana to start getting ready. Shana sighed as she headed for the shower, "You're not going to slap too much makeup on me, are you?"

Allie smiled, "Courtney is coming over in a few minutes to help me get you dressed and presentable."

Shana's blood froze in her veins and her eyes widened; "A makeover?" she said shrilly, terrified of the word enough to shudder

Allie smiled, "Only a small one…you're a combat solider, you have a busy and stressful job, you have bags under your eyes and your hair needs a trim.

Shana hugged her ponytail protectively, "You are NOT cutting my hair! Lots of women wear their hair long on their wedding day."

Allie sighed and shoved her friend towards the bathroom, "A trim is not a cut. A trim just neatens things up, gets rid of the dead ends, it will still be long. I promise."

"All right. If you promise…"

"I said I did, didn't I?"

"Yeah." Shana grumbled as she closed the bathroom door. "But it doesn't mean I have to like it."

Shana let the warm water wash over her shoulders and felt herself relax. A good, long, hot shower was special treat and she fully intended to revel in the opportunity. She smiled to herself as thought about seeing so many of her friends earlier. Duke hadn't changed a bit, she thought, still that wide grin and sense of humor. It was nice to actually see him as opposed to just talk to him on the phone or IM. She hadn't realized just how much she'd missed him until she'd seen him and looked forward to having time to actually sit down and talk with him at the party.


	2. Old Feelings

Disclaimer: We do not own GI JOE. Lyrics are from Far Away by Nickelback and are used without permission.

Can't Let You Go

Chapter 2: Old Feelings

A couple of hours later Scarlett was walking through into the bar feeling pretty good about life. She looked good, like herself but a slightly more put together self. Lady Jaye and Cover Girl hadn't gone crazy with the scissors and makeup like she'd feared. Instead they'd somehow erased the circles under her eyes, which she hadn't told Jaye were more from pre-wedding jitters than from work, made her hair shine, and had picked out an outfit they deemed "dressy casual" but without the dress. She decided the ballet flats they'd picked out were ok since this was somewhat of a special occasion. She would have preferred her boots but they'd nixed that once they'd seen the state hers were in. She'd made a mental note to buy a new pair.

Duke sat at the bar and ordered a drink. He waved to the Joes already scattered around the bar but sat on a stool and sipped his beer, thinking about how wrong the whole situation was and wondering what, if anything he could do to fix it. A Kenny Chesney song played on the radio and took him back to the last days of his relationship with Scarlett. They'd wrapped up a mission and he'd gotten them leave. He'd taken her to the beach because she loved the beach. She loved the beach, she liked the mountains but she didn't love them, not like she loved the beach. She liked to be warm-not cold. They'd chased each other in and out of the surf, laughing like idiots until they'd dropped down on their blanket, breathless with laughter. She'd told him she loved him just before she'd kissed him. He didn't think she'd even realized what she'd said. He had. He'd gotten scared, had put distance and time between them and like the idiot he was, sent her to Snake Eyes.

"You know Snake Eyes asked you to keep an eye on her, not stare at her all night." Flint came up to Duke at the bar.

"God Flint, why the fuck did I let her go?" Duke asked slamming back a shot. He ordered another from the bartender. "This is wrong. All of its wrong! She doesn't want to get married on base-she wants to get married in Ireland, in the church her parents married in with all of her family around, not just her dad and her brothers. And she sure as hell doesn't want to honeymoon in the damn fucking mountains! She hates being cold! He should know that! He should know all of it!"

Flint eyed his friend warily. Duke was in a bad place but it was too late for second chances, "Maybe it's time to focus on the friendship you want to have with her in the future. You can't rewind time and change things." Flint suggested.

"Maybe I should tell her how I feel." Duke slammed back another shot watching Scarlett from afar as she danced with her friends.

"Maybe you should keep your mouth closed. She's getting married tomorrow. Be happy for her. Don't mess things up." Flint advised.

"Things might change…" Duke countered not taking his eyes off of the bride to be.

"Duke, no good will come of this. She's not going to change her mind. She's going to marry Snake Eyes tomorrow. Telling her how you feel is only going to complicate things. You made the wrong choice and now this is how the story plays out. I hate to be so blunt but maybe you need to hear it." Flint argued.

"She needs to know," Duke stated flatly and began to walk towards Scarlett.

Flint put his hand on Duke's shoulder and pulled him back forcefully, "Don't do it."

"Flint, I already have so many regrets…" Duke trailed off closing his eyes for a moment hoping to shut out some of the hurt, "I need to do this or it will be just regret."

Flint opened his mouth for rebuttal but closed it quickly seeing in Duke's eyes how much agony this situation was putting him in.

"This is going to end badly…but do what you have to do." Flint sighed pulling his hand back. Duke nodded and made his way towards her. Flint followed hoping Duke would change his mind.

"Hey, Scarlett." he acknowledged his presence. She had been in a small huddle with Lady Jaye and Cover Girl.

"Oh, I'm so happy it's you!" she exclaimed and hugged him briefly. She handed him what looked like a playing card.

"Jaye and Cover Girl have these cards and I have to find people to do the task on the card. Some of them are pretty embarrassing." Scarlett explained blushing slightly.

"_If you are at a place with music, the next person to talk to you has to request a song for you and dance with you for the whole song."_

"You're the first victim of this crazy game, I'm afraid." Scarlett nervously laughed hoping Duke would go along with whatever the card said.

"Hey, that's not fair! It's supposed to be someone you don't know!" Jaye cried.

"It doesn't say that on the card." Scarlett argued.

"I think she has you on a technicality." Cover Girl agreed with Scarlett.

"Fine, but for the rest of them it has to be someone you DON'T know." Jaye crossed her arms.

"What card did you get, Duke?" Cover Girl asked

"I have to request a song for Scarlett and then dance with her for the whole song." Duke told them.

"Ugh, that's a lame one!" Jaye cried as she sorted through the cards, "Let me see if I can find the one about getting the person to give you their underwear …"

"Oh god…" Scarlett groaned mortified.

"Jaye, let Duke do this one…Keep the underwear one for next. She'll have to ask a complete stranger." Cover Girl deviously grinned.

"Good thinking, Court." Jaye high fived her.

"This night is going to be really interesting." Scarlett sighed afraid of what was to come.

"Of course it is! It's your bachelorette party! You're supposed to get wild and crazy!" Jaye exclaimed.

"I'm going to request that song now. I'll be back." Duke told her.

"Make sure it's a good one!" Scarlett warned teasingly.

The current song died down and the DJ took to the microphone and made the dedication to Scarlett. Lady Jaye and Cover Girl hooped and hollered as Duke took her onto the dance floor.

"They've had way too much to drink." Scarlett shook her head at the scene her friends were causing.

"They just want you to have a good time." Duke smiled as the music started. It was a slow song, which startled Scarlett, but she went along with it since it was Duke's choice.

"You're right." Scarlett nodded and put her arms around Duke. He wrapped his arms closely around her, pulling her tightly to him. She felt a little nervous dancing with him this close. She knew she shouldn't be nervous because they were good friends, but she was. It felt all too familiar…like when they had dated. Scarlett felt her stomach flip flop like she was on a roller coaster. Was it butterflies or pre-wedding jitters or both? Scarlett decided to concentrate on listening to the lyrics to keep her mind from analyzing her feelings any deeper.

"_This time, This place  
Misused, Mistakes  
Too long, Too late  
Who was I to make you wait  
Just one chance  
Just one breath  
Just in case there's just one left  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know…_

_I love you  
I've loved you all along _

_I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore"_

Scarlett blinked a few times trying to give herself a reality check. Did she hear the lyrics correctly? Was Duke serious when he picked this song?

"_On my knees, I'll ask  
Last chance for one last dance  
'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of hell to hold your hand  
I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything but I won't give up  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know_

I love you  
I've loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore"

She felt his breath in her ear. It made her shiver slightly. Now her stomach was churning like she was in rocky seas. She had no idea Duke still felt this way. Her mind felt hazy. She still wasn't even sure she was hearing the lyrics correctly. This had totally blindsided her.

"_So far away…so far away  
Been far away for far too long  
So far away…so far away  
Been far away for far too long  
But you know, you know, you know…_

_I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I've loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long  
So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go"_

The music faded away and Scarlett held her breath not knowing what to make of all this. She didn't know what to say to him or how to act. She wasn't even sure if this moment was for real.

"Scarlett don't do it…" Duke begged pulling back from her slightly so he could see her eyes.

"What?" Scarlett asked, still feeling foggy.

"Don't marry Snake Eyes." Duke almost pouted.

"What?" Scarlett asked again as a knee jerk reaction to Duke's unbelievable request. Were her ears working tonight?

Duke didn't answer again. Instead he pulled her back to him and kissed her hard.

Her mind went reeling. She felt like someone had just thrown a bucket of cold water on her, demanding her to realize that this was actually happening. He knew the way she liked to be kissed and was using that information to make this moment all the more intense. The shock of the situation was wearing off and she was able to regain control of her mind and body. Duke was kissing her and he had no right! She was getting married tomorrow! She began to struggle against the kiss and was able to get her arms in between them to shove him away.

"How dare you!" she cried venomously and slapped him across the face. She stormed out of the bar without looking at anyone.

Duke was suddenly aware of the eyes of his friends on him. He turned to look at their stunned faces. He then bolted after her.

"Scarlett..." he called stepping outside looking to see where she had gone.

"Don't talk to me!" she snarled almost choking on a sob. She felt so dizzy from what was transpiring.

"I'm sorry but I had to tell you. I already made the mistake of not telling you how I felt. I wasn't going to make that mistake again." Duke explained himself.

"Of all the selfish, pig headed things…" Scarlett muttered through tears.

"You want to talk about selfish?" Duke asked getting riled up, "Who goes off for weeks at a time never letting you know where he is or what he's doing? Who always chooses his ninja clan over everything else, including you? If that's not selfish, I don't know what is. I even have my doubts that he'll show up tomorrow." Duke fired. By now, most of the Joes had made their way outside to witness the confrontation. Jaye was at Scarlett's side trying to calm her down. "Just tell me you didn't feel anything for me when we kissed." Duke challenged.

"I'm getting married tomorrow." Scarlett answered angrily.

"That doesn't answer my question." Duke narrowed his eyes.

"I love Snake Eyes and after I tell him what you've done you'll be lucky if he doesn't skin you alive," Scarlett spat.

"Still not answering my question."

"You know what? I'm done with this. I'm done with you. Thank you for ruining my night and don't even THINK about coming to the wedding tomorrow. I don't want to see you ever again!" Scarlett screamed. She turned towards Jaye and softly whispered, "Get me out of here."

The group was silent as they watched Jaye and Scarlett head towards the parking lot. Once the two women were out of site, the rest of the crowd dispersed, some heading back into the bar others heading into the parking lot.

"I think we need to go." Flint softly decided. Duke nodded and the two headed for Flint's car.

Back at base, Duke felt like the walk to his quarters was extra long tonight. Just everything seemed to be in slow motion. He swiped his passkey in the lock happy at the thought of crashing on his bed. He turned on the light and Snake Eyes was sitting on his couch.

Duke jumped back, "Geez, Snakes. How'd you get in here?" He asked more out of shock than really wanting to know. Snake Eyes was a ninja; of course he had ways of getting where he needed or wanted to be.

"_Give me one good reason I shouldn't take you out right now." _Snake Eyes signed furiously as he stood up and stalked toward Duke.

Duke stood his ground, watching Snake Eyes warily but determined still he had done the right thing. "I had to tell her. I regret not telling her before. I just couldn't let her go without making sure"

"_What? That she didn't still have feelings for you? Do you think she'd be marrying me if she had feelings for someone else?" _Snake Eyes interrupted Duke with signing.

Duke glared and gritted his teeth, "I don't know. I just had to do it. I figured this was my last chance to let her know how I felt."

"_Damn straight this will be the last chance! I don't want her to see you ever again!" _Snake Eyes yelled with his hands.

"Don't worry; I won't be seeing her again. She made it clear that I am no longer a part of her life and I'm certainly no longer invited to the wedding!" Duke spat out, suddenly disgusted with the whole conversation. He just wanted to go to bed and pretend he was somewhere else.

"_Oh no, I want you at the wedding." _Snake Eyes nodded slowly. Duke raised an eyebrow in question. _"I want you to have a front row seat to watch Scarlett become mine forever. Why do you think I picked you to be best man in the first place?"_

Duke jerked back as if he'd been hit, "Wait, so this whole time your reason for having me be your best man was to twist the knife in my back? To show me what I foolishly lost?" Duke asked trying to digest the fact that Snake Eyes was being so calculating.

_"You mean what you threw away! That knife has been in my back since Scarlett and I got back together. Do you know how hard it is to love someone who can't give you their whole heart? Do you know how hard it is to be in a relationship where you know you were the second choice? " _

"Snakes, that's crazy. Scarlett loves you. Her world revolves around you." Duke shook his head sharply in disagreement.

_"You rejected her. She wanted you. I could see it in her eyes when she came and told me we were taking the assignment. She seemed so lost, so unsure of herself…I'd never seen her like that before."_

"What's done is done. You should focus on the future. She'll be walking down the aisle tomorrow for you. She made it pretty clear tonight that she wants to spend the rest of her life with you."

_"She will, and you can be sure that I'll never give her a reason to go back to you-ever! After tomorrow if you lay a hand on her or so much as glance in her direction I'll rip you apart piece by piece and no one will ever know what happened to you." _

After the ninja had left as suddenly and silently as he had appeared, Duke sat down on the couch, head in hands, and wondered how the hell his life had gotten so mixed up.


	3. Happily Ever After?

Disclaimer: We do not own GI JOE.

Can't Let You Go

Chapter 3: Happily Ever After?

Duke stood before his mirror smoothing down his dress uniform. He grunted slightly thinking of what the events of the day would bring. If he had the choice, he'd rather be Cobra's prisoner than have to witness the wedding. His chest already felt tight just thinking of Scarlett and Snake's marrying. What would happen when it actually became official? He left his quarters and walked towards the conference area.

"Where the hell are you going?" Flint asked coming up from behind him.

"To the wedding," Duke answered sharply.

"But Scarlett doesn't want you there." Flint reminded him.

"But Snakes does. He paid me a little visit last night." Duke answered curtly.

"He said that?" Flint asked with wide eyes.

"Yup. He wants me to have a front row seat."

"I'll never understand that ninja." Flint shook his head, "I would keep a low profile though. I don't think Scarlett will be too happy knowing you're here."

"Trust me. I plan on staying out of the way as much as I can." Duke agreed.

"Hey man, I'm sorry. This must be hell for you. I wish it could be different." Flint suddenly remembered how Duke must be feeling.

"Me, too" Duke nodded at his friend.

"I have to go get Snakes from his quarters. Just try to stay out of Scarlett's view and I think everything will be alright." Flint reminded him as he parted. Duke continued down the hallway until he came to a room with the door partially open. Through the opening, he saw Scarlett standing in front of a mirror looking at herself dressed in her wedding gown. Her lace dress hugged her curves until it reached her waist, flaring out gradually from there to pool at her feet. Her shoulders were bare and her gorgeous red hair pulled into an elegant knot at the nape of her neck. Elegant was the word that immediately came to mind. He'd never seen her like this. Lady Jaye was bent around her fussing with the train of the dress. His breath was instantly taken away and he had to lean on the door frame for support.

"Scarlett, you look gorgeous." Lady Jaye smiled standing up and looking into the mirror with her friend.

"Thanks, this was my mom's dress..." Scarlett started and choked out a sob.

"I'm sure she can see you and she's so happy for you." Lady Jaye smiled trying to ease the bittersweet moment.

"I just pictured this day so different. I don't know…. It's like you dream of your wedding day for so long and now it's here and it should be perfect and all smiles…" Scarlett nervously rattled.

"And Duke should be the groom?" Lady Jaye softly questioned.

"When he kissed me last night, all those feelings that I thought had gone away just came right back to the surface. He's always made me weak in the knees and …for a minute there I wanted him to keep kissing me." Scarlett admitted burying her head in her hands.

"Scarlett, you're just having wedding day jitters. It's ok. It's a little scary to bind yourself to one person for life. Of course it's ok to think of the "what if's". This is a huge leap you're taking. Why do you think they call it 'the plunge'?" Lady Jaye reasoned.

"Do you think I was too hard on him? I mean I am furious with him….but is it worth throwing away our friendship?" Scarlett asked.

"I think he'll be okay with not coming to the wedding." Lady Jaye replied.

"You think so?" Scarlett asked hopefully.

"Think about it. He loves you. You think it would be easy to stand there and watch you be betrothed to someone else? I'm sure he's fine about not being there."

"Oh..." Scarlett realized how hurtful this whole situation must be to him, "so why did he agree to be Snake Eye's best man? I mean he could have rsvp-ed with regrets."

"Duke loves you. He'd do anything for you…including agreeing to stand in your wedding to someone else. He just wants to do whatever would make you happy."

"It's too bad he decided to show me his feelings now when it's too late." Scarlett sighed as she fastened a necklace with a small pearl heart charm outlined in gold.

"You're going to have a wonderful life with Snake Eyes. He loves you more than life itself." Lady Jaye smiled brightly.

"I know. I'm so lucky. I love him too."

At that moment he felt someone pull him back from the door.

"Flint!" Duke yelped in surprise as to who had jerked him back, "You wouldn't believe the conversation I just heard."

"Not now. You have to leave." Flint whispered trying to budge him down the hallway.

"Why? What's going on?" Duke asked concerned after seeing the serious look on Flint's face.

"He's gone. Snake Eye's is gone." Flint revealed.

"What do you mean, he's gone?" Duke asked with a sinking feeling.

"He's not here. He left a note saying his clan needed him and that he was sorry. We've already checked the whole base." Flint sighed.

"No, he didn't…he wouldn't…she doesn't deserve this." Duke boiled through clenched teeth.

"What's going on?" Scarlett demanded coming to the door with Lady Jaye after hearing some ruckus outside. She narrowed her eyes at Duke, "What are you doing here?"

"He was just leaving." Flint replied and entered the room ushering both girls back in the room. Duke watched from the door as Flint handed Scarlett the note as he spoke softly to her. Her eyes scanned the note and she looked up at Flint with tears silently streaming down her stunned face. Duke felt his heart being ripped out and his stomach churning. He felt so sick over what was going on. Never in a million years would he have wished this on her. His heart ached wishing he could take away her pain. He couldn't believe this was happening.

"You!" he heard her scream which jolted him out of his thoughts. He saw her fiercely storming towards him until she was inches from his face. "Somehow this is your fault! I know it is!"

"No…" Duke shook his head softly. Tears pricked his eyes knowing how heartbroken she was feeling.

"Yes…you said something to him...you made him go away." Scarlett screamed through her tears.

"Scarlett, I didn't. I swear to you."

"Duke, just go." Flint warned.

"This is your fault. I'll never forgive you." Scarlett spat before being pulled back by Lady Jaye and Flint.

"Scarlett, I didn't….I had no idea…" Duke continued to defend his innocence.

"Duke, GO!" Flint demanded and shut the door.


	4. Comfort

Disclaimer: We do not own GI JOE. Lyrics are Far Away by Nickelback and are used without permission.

Can't Let You Go

Chapter 4: Comfort

Scarlett snuggled deeper under the blanket Lady Jaye had thrown over her a while ago. She felt tears well up in her eyes again and willed them to stop. She focused on the radio her dad had turned on for her before he'd left. The music was soft so she really had to concentrate to listen, a good thing. The song changed and she smiled when she recognized it. It had been playing the night she and Duke had decided to try their hands at baking cookies. She couldn't cook and had warned him of this before they'd snuck down to the mess hall to "borrow" the necessary ingredients. Bags of flour and sugar were spread out on his small counter next to a couple of loose eggs and a package of chocolate she'd gotten from her stash. It was her one contribution to the task at hand. She laughed remembering Duke accidently spilling flour on her. She screamed and flung a handful of flour at him. The next instant they were racing around his quarters trying to both throw and dodge flour bombs. They'd ended up on the floor, laughing so hard they couldn't either one breath. Then they'd been breathless for a different reason entirely. They'd always had that heat, and he'd always been able to make her laugh. The song changed again but she only listened with half an ear, drifting off to sleep still caught up in pleasant, happy memories from long ago.

_Been far away for far too long  
But you know, you know, you know…_

"…shouldn't have told me to go in the first place…" she murmured, closing her eyes

_I wanted  
I wanted you to stay _

"…how the hell was I supposed to know, what am I? A mind reader?"  
_'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I've loved you all along _

"…_why is it the girl always has to be the one to say it first anyways…why are those three words so hard to say..." _

_And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long _

"…_all your fault in the first place…if you'd just told me earlier I wouldn't have left you…" She bolted upright, "What am I saying? What am I talking about? Snakes left me…" _

_So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore _

She drew in a deep breath, "…not Snakes…I wasn't thinking about Snakes…Oh, God, Duke what did I do? Why did I say those awful things? Oh, shit what if he really believed me…" She didn't think she just got up and started walking, bare feet and all. The last lyrics of the song played in her mind as she walked_  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go"_

"…I didn't mean it, not really….I don't want you to go…I don't want you to leave me alone…you always make it better…I need you…stupid man…"

The day after the disastrous almost wedding, Duke was sitting on his couch, studying the ceiling. He'd really screwed up with her. Not only had he lost any chance he might ever have of being with her, and they would have been good together, of that he had no doubt. He would have been better for than Snake Eyes. He snorted, 'at this point, anyone would be better for her…' he thought. He slumped deeper into the cushions. He mourned the loss of his romantic relationship but he mourned the loss of her friendship more. With friendship he could keep an eye on her, make sure she was happy. There would always be the hope that maybe, one day…

A quiet knock sounded on the door to his quarters. He frowned at the ceiling; he hadn't heard anyone walk up, had he been that lost in thought? There wasn't a second knock. But something made him get up and walk to the door. When he opened it, he was so surprised he couldn't say anything. There she was, the woman of his dreams, coming to see him on purpose.

She looked up, arms wrapped around herself, eyes red and swollen, he had never seen her look so small. "Can I come in?" she asked quietly

He blinked, just to be sure he wasn't dreaming, "Of course, uh, can I get you something…water…coffee…no…okay…" He stopped talking when her lip trembled. 'Please, don't,' he thought, 'please don't shed any more tears over that moronic asshole.

She swiped quickly at her tears, embarrassed that she'd let them leak out. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean it, I swear I didn't!"

He shook his head, "Sorry for what? You don't have anything to apologize to me for…"

She held out a hand, "Duke, please, just let me get this out, okay?"

He nodded and felt helpless as she took a shaky breath to steady herself, "Okay, do you want to sit down…"

She shook her head no, "I said some things, at the bar, and especially just before the…" she couldn't bring herself to say wedding, she just couldn't, "I said some things to you that I shouldn't have said. It wasn't your fault. I was angry and upset and you were there-an easy target. It was easier to blame you than to blame him…to blame myself."

"It's not your damn fault!" He yelled. "Sorry, sorry…he shouldn't have left you and he sure as hell shouldn't have done it by leaving a note. "

"No, he shouldn't have." A moment of silent went by, "I didn't mean for it to ruin our friendship." She looked away unsure of what else she could say, "Anyway, I'm still scheduled for leave and dad's gonna take me home a while. I thought I might go down, see everyone for a day or two and then head to Ireland. I have some things I need to think about." It was harder than she thought to find the words she wanted; she just wanted his friendship …was it too late for even that?

"And you were always able to find peace there."

She nodded but didn't say anything, just kept looking down at her feet.

"Scarlett," he paused and then spoke again using her name, "Shana, if you need anything, extra time, someone to take care of the details, a friend, a shoulder to cry on…I'm here, ok. No strings."

She looked up, "No strings? Can you be just my friend and nothing more? Can you really do that?" she asked, not believing

He looked deep inside himself for the strength, to make sure, he wouldn't tell her yes and then take it back later, even if it killed him, which it very well may, "Yes, I can."

"Okay." She said through her tears and practically launched herself at him, letting her sobs out.

His arms went around her and he held her while she cried, stroking a hand over her hair, over her back, in comfort, nothing more. When he realized she was actually going to be crying for a while he picked her up gently and sat back down on the couch.

A long time later she spoke, "Thanks, Conrad. I think I'm all cried out now."

"Sure?"

She gave a watery laugh, "Yeah, I'm sure. Listen…about what I said…about you being right…"

"Yeah?"

"You were right about a lot of things. I was really angry, because, as usual, your timing sucks and I didn't want to think about it. I do love him, Conrad. I did…but…"

"Ssshh…it's okay. Whatever your feelings…they're ok." He pulled back so he could look at her. He brushed damp strands of hair from her face, "Go to Ireland, take some time…when you get back, if you still want to be friends we'll be friends. If you get back and you're mad at me again, it's okay. I can deal."

She nodded her head, confused and mixed up inside but calmer for coming here. "When I get back to work…I don't…" she took a deep breath, "…I don't want to see him, okay? Can you do that for me?"

"Sure."

"Thanks. I need to get back, daddy's probably in a panic. I didn't think I'd be gone this long."

"Want me to walk you back?"

She snorted, "No, I've been the brunt of enough gossip today, thanks."

He nodded his head, not quite sure what to say now. He walked her to the door.

She paused in the hallway and turned back to him, "Thanks Conrad, I feel better now, stronger. Having a friend helped." She smiled, a shadow of her usually bright smile, but it was a smile none the less. He felt his heart turn over in his chest.

He swallowed before answering, "Any time." And he meant it.

She nodded, understanding he would be there again if she needed him. She walked back towards her quarters, feeling lighter and finally back in control of life.


End file.
